Ugh! Church (to me) is such a churchy word. The older I get, the more I don’t like sounding so “churchy”. Several years ago I had done everything but said out loud that I was giving up on organized church. Boy! Does God have a sense of humor? I was hurt. I was broken. My heart was calloused. There were so many things I didn’t like. I could only see the worst in people. I went through a season of being angry with God. I. NEEDED. HELP. But in my mind, the church was the problem, not me. I was so tired of it all. The church lingo, the familiar routine, and the hypocrisy. Ouch. I’m appalled to admit these things now. God was closer than I realized. How merciful and patient He was during that time. You see some of us are so broken we can’t see that far outside of ourselves. To look at my (then) present condition and think, “Man, I’m messed up. I better get myself some help” was just too mature a thought. Most of us have to hit rock bottom. Most of us have to find ourselves in the desert with no water or on empty with no fuel in sight. And that place, that bottom of the barrel, pitiful place…is a great and terrifying grace. It’s in this place that God can reposition our hearts and make us willing, again.

When Cam and I started taking the steps toward church planting, I had so many fears surface. Will I have to sacrifice my family for ministry? What if we give our lives away and get nothing in return? What if people reject us and mock us? Can we do this? Are we capable of handling this and raising a big family? I hate to admit this, but I may have given my husband more resistance than anyone or anything else. It was hard to take this leap, even harder to do it with a willful and joyful and supportive spirit. As God dealt tenderly with my heart (and my sweet husband, also) we said yes, moved forward, and are continuing on this journey.

When we started doing ‘church,’ we were just meeting at home on Tuesday nights. Our group was odd compared to normal standards. We had people from every walk and age of life you could imagine. Some people came with legalistic mentalities, LGBT, former atheist, covered in tattoos, and older people with troubles adjusting to the new age of the church. People came that had been raised in the south, some had Quaker roots; the list goes on and on. But the one thing we all had in common, was meeting every week was changing us. Matter of fact, for some of us, it was saving our lives. Coming together and engaging in community was transforming us, keeping us more encouraged than ever. You see; being loved by Jesus and His people will rearrange your spiritual DNA, that’s a fact. And it was happening.

Have you given up on church? Have you turned away because you don’t want to pretend and crave authenticity? Are you without hope because of past experiences with church and church people?

God beckons us to try over and over and over again. Through the good weeks and through the bad weeks. Through the powerful, life changing, incredible move of God weeks and then through the busy, painful, hurts-to-breath, nothing-is-working-right-then-my-car-breaks-down kind of weeks. That’s why we swim against the current. That’s why we wait even when it looks like nothing’s going to happen. That’s why we love the ones people give up on. That’s why we invest in people’s lives even though they may never change. That’s why we keep facing rejection. That’s why we keep rowing even when the waves are against us. That’s why we choose the hard work of staying in community even when we disagree. That’s why when our bodies are exhausted and our egos get bruised, and offense knocks on our door…we keep going because we want to be in the right spot, at the right time when Jesus shows up. But the most beautiful thing isn’t just the part when He shows up…but when we keep going anyways. It’s where we decide to keep going even though we’re weary. When we choose to believe even though we’re afraid nothing is going to happen. When all we can think about is all the things we’ve tried and failed at before. It’s where we’re in the position for when Jesus does surprise us…we…are…ready.

I want to close by sharing a portion of a recent post by author Jen Hatmaker, which actually inspired me to write this blog.

“Listen, church is the most imperfect thing I can think of. It is. It can wound as much as it heals, and it sometimes shuts its doors when Jesus bids us “go to the street corners and invite anyone you can find.” It gets much wrong because people lead it and we are a historic mess.

But if we can take the idea of “church” out of its weird, fancy, western context, out of the realm of entertainment, off the pedestal of perfect leaders and shiny living, away from the barely disguised goal of self-help, apart from the evil of protected hierarchy and exclusionary doctrines, and bring it all down to the ground, into the streets, around the table, and to its knees, church can be the most healing, life transformative place to meet the real Jesus…the one who loves us all and upended power structures and valued every out-casted person made in His image.

Church and Christians can so strangely keep us from Jesus, but if you find a faith community that feels like the gospels and sticks together even though their leaders are just medium people and stuff goes sideways…that messy, kind of lame, ragged bunch of folks just might save your life, too.”

You see, community is His plan. His brilliantly, carefully crafted design to provide a home for us, no matter what biological cards we’re dealt. May God grant us the courage to commit, and to believe in church, once again.

 

 

Hello 316 Family!! We officially have 25 services under our belt. Each time I write a newsletter I realize I start by saying the same things.  

 -It’s been exciting!  -Great things are happening!  -God is on the move!  

 And here I am again with the same news, yet it feels even bigger than each time before. Life with Christ is a life of continual newness! Today, with greater intensity, we’re feeling and experiencing the move and momentum of God in our lives and in our community. How sweet and faithful He’s been to us. It’s hard to believe the conception of The 316 Church started around 2 years ago. With lots of perseverance and lessons along the way, we’re seeing God bring to life what He put in our hearts back in the winter of 2016.  

•  We have a whopping 60 members along with many more unofficial members. 
• In addition to Sunday service, we have our Tuesday night Bible Study led by Jordan and Tandee Rousselle. Our adult group is going through the book of James.  
• We’ve started a Youth Group for teens that meets on Tuesday night as well. Our teens are going through the book of Ephesians, led by Ian Woods and Autumn Walton.  

• Our Sunday morning Children’s Ministry has developed and taken form, which has been so fun to watch, thanks to Sheena Jackson. She has enhanced our kids experience in church by leaps and bounds and we’re incredibly grateful! Her many years of teaching have been a great asset. She puts her heart into planning weekly lessons and activities for our kids. Our kids are learning something each week that relates to Pastor Cam’s message and do crafts that help them remember the lesson. 
• We have 2 functioning kid’s rooms now, thanks to Paula Fernandez. She put in the hard work and got our nursery organized and running. She, too, brings many years of experience and benefits to our children’s ministry and we are so incredibly thankful. We’ve had 3 new members volunteer to be part of our children’s ministry rotation as well as some of our youth.  
• We just held our first New Member’s lunch last Sunday, 2/25, and had 25 people in attendance. We had a good time sharing the 316 vision and answering questions.  
• Also, back on December 9th we got to fulfill some church vision by holding our first Marriage Workshop.  
• We’re also thrilled to announce that Shelter & Rain, a freedom and protection from human trafficking non-profit, founded by members Eric and Janie Ford, received their 501c3 status and are official. We celebrate this victory with them and continue to support them with every resource we have.  
• We also want to thank Hugo and Paula Fernandez for cleaning the church every week. The church has never looked (or smelled) better.  

• Many thanks to Julie Oshel-Munoz and Judy Sharp, along with Georgie Chancellor for being our intercessors. They have been passionate and faithful, praying for every need in our community as well as making themselves available to others who need extra encouragement and support. This is a vital role in a healthy church and we value them so much.  
• We can’t forget our father, Don Jackson, who not only put in countless hours to get our building ready for our original launch date, but has since upgraded our entire sound system. We want to thank you for overseeing our sound and technology with your expertise.  
• And if all of that goodness wasn’t enough…we are ECSTATIC to announce The 316 now has our very own Worship Team, making their debut Sunday, March 4th. We want to thank Thurston Mitchell, Bacarri Washington, and Eric Ford for offering their incredible talents to us. They are an answered prayer and huge step forward for us!  
• Hugo Fernandez has been a huge blessing to us. He’s jumped in and taken over building projects that were not complete. He’s built a brand-new sound booth. He’s currently finishing an office space for Pastor Cameron and also finishing a storage space for the church. There isn’t enough gratitude we can express for helping us with this second phase of construction. He’s also provided us with a sense of support and backing. He’s been a true servant and armor-bearer. We are so grateful for he and his family.  
• And last but not least, we want to thank Tisha Alvarez for keeping our books and stepping into the role of church Treasurer. You continue to bring us organization and ease and we appreciate all you’ve done!  
• Each day we’re identifying new leaders and creating new ways to use all the gifts and talents within this amazing group of people. I want to honor this community for jumping in and contributing to being a working part of this body. 

Cam and I have been so humbled and elated to watch this body grow and begin to take positions in helping all things move and function. We’re extremely passionate about discipleship and growing leaders and there’s nothing better than watching the vision take root in the hearts of people and watch them rise up and lead. It’s completely beautiful.  

 “The most creative social strategy we have to offer is the church. Here we show the world a manner of life the world can never achieve through social coercion or governmental action. We serve the world by showing it something that it is not, namely, a place where God is forming a family out of strangers.” –Stanley Hauerwas 

 We are so proud of this precious family. We’re here to support you and stand with you through every high and low. To continue to press on through every growing pain. We will continue to strive to be a place of grace and truth. A place of love and safety. A place of unity and diversity. A place that never gives up on anyone. 

 It’s never too late, if you’re looking for a church home please consider joining us. We welcome you as you are, and look forward to knowing you. Don’t give up on church. God has more for you and we desire to help ignite that hope once again. But I caution you, we have some dedicated huggers. And if you aren’t a hugger by nature, chances are you will be converted at some time during attendance. You can’t say we didn’t warn you. 

 We love y’all!  

 #WeR316 #JoinTheMovement 

 

 

 

Wow. The 316 is officially launched with our first 2 Sunday services behind us. What a wild ride it’s been. There’s so much to share. As many of you know, we moved back to Wichita in June of 2016 with plans to launch The 316 in September of that year. My oh my…did our plans fail. You may also know we were offered the old Grace United Methodist building as a gift with a price tag of only $1. A grand 40,000 sq ft building that had all the accommodations of a ministers dream. After fighting hard for that building and exhausting all efforts of due diligence we painfully, so painfully walked away from that offer. Man. God used that. What a lesson that was. Such a season of stripping us down, humbling us, and giving us an opportunity to trust Him.

When you make the biggest faith jump of your life and abandon everything that makes sense (a good job, financial security for your family, a comfortable life) and dive head first into your calling and meet it with momentum, lots of people excited about what you’re doing, and a building that falls in your lap for a $1, the recipe is perfect for an inflated ego. I have to be honest, we were beaming. We was beat boxing down the street with our snap back on backwards walking with a side step! We didn’t mean to. We didn’t know it happening. But it was happening in those deep places of our heart that only we can see. That’s what we know now. I’m convinced this lesson’s been learned by every minister of the gospel around the globe. The stripping, the humbling, the emptying of ourselves is part of every one of our stories. 1 Corinthians 1:20, “So that no flesh can glory in His presence.” Thank God He’s good enough to interrupt our plans and slow down our progress to deal with our heart. Had he not, the temptation was there to become everything we hate. We are grateful. So very grateful.

After the initial blow of not getting the building we didn’t know exactly what to do. We were totally humbled and decided to surrender our hearts once again. We let go of all our plans. We let go of what we wanted. We just let go. We were searching for some direction. We wanted to stay faithful and also nurture our loyal group, but also start with a clean slate. So through all the inner turmoil we stopped Sunday services and started house church. We began meeting weekly, sharing a meal and taking part in each other’s highs and lows. Spending some time in the Word and working hard at staying in community. We became family. Like, a real family. And it was the best thing that could have ever happened to us.

Slowly but surely we started looking at more properties in hopes to find a home for The 316. We dared not to tell anyone because we wanted to protect them this time from setting their hopes on something. We didn’t want to tell anyone until it was a done deal. This process took longer than expected, but we didn’t mind much this time. We had a weekly routine that kept us all encouraged and we were standing on Psalm 127:1 “Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it.” We let go of all our expectations and desires and took the back seat. Our priority became people and our desire was to let God build the house.

One afternoon Pastor Loren came down from Salina to offer some extra support and went looking at buildings with us. He took us to lunch, prayed with us, and just spent some time encouraging us. We always wanted to be on the East side of Wichita since before moving here. We felt called to the East side specifically. But after looking at property we soon gave that up because of East side prices. “Oh ye of little faith!” Ha! We almost settled on a small property on South Seneca. Not the area we wanted or the space we had imagined. But we thought, “We’ll just work our way over to the East side eventually.” We were going to give it some much needed TLC and start regardless of it’s lack of curb appeal. But then we called one last property. Low and behold, it was Ginny. Our contact turned friend who worked for the same owner who offered us the church for $1. When she heard it was us still looking for a building she jumped to the occasion and sincerely wanted to help. She led us to our home. When she told us about the property and asked if we wanted to see it, we declined. It was well out of our price range. She then shared with us it had been sitting empty for so long the owner may take less for it. So her idea was to look at it anyway and see what we thought. We walked into a building the same size as the one we almost settled for on South Seneca but much newer and well taken care of. The only problem was, it was full of cubicles. They weren’t a problem for me. My love for interior design and decorating took my eye right past the cubbies and I could already envision a sanctuary. My husband, however, was a bit more skeptical. But we both agreed it was much closer to what we were always looking for. Ginny prayed with us right there in the front lobby and we made the choice 2 days later to make an offer. With great anticipation, the owner accepted. And if that wasn’t divine enough, he gave us the first month free to work on the building and make the necessary changes. The 316 finally had a home. It was a good day. We were thrilled to share it with our team and we spent the next 8 weeks plowing through a massive yet fulfilling project.

Opening Sunday was September 10th, we had a house full of family, friends, strangers, and well wishers! It was an exciting and beautiful day. An anointed time of worship and a piercing Word on the love of Jesus. We’re happy to begin a new season. Cam and I are so extremely thankful for this journey and also for the team of people we share it with. Our lives have been blessed immensely by those God’s put around us.

If this is your first newsletter you’ve read or you’d like to know more about 316, here’s a little about who we are. We’re husband and wife first, parents to 5 beautiful children, and a blended family. And collectively, we’re a community of people who are genuinely in love with Jesus. Cam thinks he’s still a certified pro athlete and I think I’m way funnier than I actually am. Cameron is also the pastor. The last bit often makes people feel awkward. They try not to swear around us, which mostly makes us laugh. And they also think we can’t relate to them. But Christianity is not about not swearing. Christianity is about Jesus. Our mission at The 316 is to help you see Jesus and give you an opportunity to encounter Him in a real way. Discovering the depths of His love has become our obsession, our passion, and our delight. Cam met Jesus as young boy and surrendered his heart to him in college. My mother introduced me to Jesus at the age of 17, and we’ve continued on a journey of joy and discovery until this day. Our greatest desire is to help people find their way out of the religious standard that’s condemned them and find freedom in the grace and life of Christ. Jesus is not your accuser. He’s not your prosecutor. He’s your friend and your rescuer. Don’t hide from him in shame or reject him in self righteousness. Don’t allow the opinions of other people to shape your concept of him. Get to know him for yourself, and let the goodness of God change you from the inside out. Our doors are open and we beckon you as you are. We ask you to join us, in all of the mud you stand in, and follow after Jesus with us.

Please pray with us as we trust God to provide a permanent worship leader. Pray for our team as we establish systems and routines that make things work smoothly and non burdensome. Pray for our hearts and relationships. Pray for our unity. Thank you for your love and support. Thank you for every donation big or small. Thank you for loving us and encouraging us. And last but not least, thank you to the best parents a child could ask for! The 316 would not be standing now if not for Don and Sheena Jackson. We love y’all sooo much!

#weR316

Join the movement.

 

 

Not another one of those sappy love posts, right? Honestly, those often get on my nerves too. I certainly never expected to become the girl who did that all the time. So, allow me to explain my heart. Meeting Cameron was one of the most unexpected things in my life. My kids and I were in such a good place, finally. I had been through some extreme ups and downs since my divorce 6 years prior, and with all the hard lessons that came in those early days, my life had settled. My heart had settled. I came crawling back to the foot of the cross about 3 years before meeting Cam and God had truly kept me under His wing. It was like a 3 year, one on one, special treatment ICU period with Jesus. To this day, those years with Christ were the most intimate I’ve ever experienced and I will always remember them as the years He held me close. Call me crazy, but my heart would beat faster as bedtime for the kids approached because I knew my time with the Lord was near. It was a sacred and precious era.

Upon meeting Cameron, everything in me told me to retreat. I had no time for anything that didn’t come served on a platter from Jesus Himself. But I also wasn’t fully aware that because of all the triggers set off by my past, Jesus could have come in human form and I still might have missed him. Then started the pursuit.

It was so premature, but I sought council from a trusted friend on how to handle myself. I saw Christ in Cameron. I heard Christ in his speech and seen Him in his behavior. But I was scared. My heart had deceived me before and quite honestly, I didn’t trust myself. I was so surprised how scared I was…I was in a really good place, remember? But the raw feelings of vulnerability had my insecurities in an uproar before we were even “in a relationship”. Lol, I laugh typing this, what delicate creatures we are. I was given some of the most profound advice. My friend showed me in scripture how the man always pursued the woman. She told me that guarding my heart was MY responsibility and I had no obligation to open it up to anyone who hadn’t laid out his intentions for me, and even then, it would be my choice. As I sat and thought about my relationship with the Father, I realized it was exactly that way. Not only did He pursue me, but loving Him back was always my choice. Even in my pain, He waited. He approached me so gently asking if He could walk me through it. And if I wasn’t ready, or I simply couldn’t, He just waited for me. I was really liberated by this revelation. This might seem foundational to all you seasoned saints reading it, but you have to realize this was the first time in my life I was healthy enough to process through this in a real life experience. This was the first time my mind was clear, I wasn’t bleeding in pain or desperate enough to grab at the wind. This was the first time I was close enough to Christ that it didn’t really matter if I had a relationship or not. When you grow up without any example of what it looks like for a man to love a woman, and vise versa, we tend to look at our peers, the media, and everything around us and just start to follow the trends. But at this point I had Jesus, and He was enough. My fear turned into peace, and a really cool friendship followed. Then something happened.

Not long after this conversation with my friend and gaining my newfound perspective I was talking to Cam and his tone became more serious. We always enjoyed talking and our conversations were always colorful and never dull of substance and laughter. But all of a sudden, he wanted to TALK to me (insert big eye emoji face). Cameron told me he wanted to pursue a serious relationship with me and my children and told me his intention for me was marriage. I remember this moment like it was yesterday. This is a moment that is marked in my memory and will be imprinted on my heart forever. I don’t remember what I said back to him in that exact moment, but I know it hit me like a ton of bricks. Whatever I said next must have been some verbal expression of doubt because he then told me that showing me what love is supposed to be and raising my children with me would be the biggest honor of his life. He also assured me that he weighed and considered everything it meant to be with me and he knew exactly what he was doing. I remember that night very well. Cameron didn’t learn this until much later, but after we got off the phone I laid on the floor next to my bed crying. Actually, I was sobbing. It was that ugly, snot nose cry that’s almost beyond your control. I laid next to my bed that night and wept like a baby only able to utter the words “THANK YOU”. Repeatedly I said these words. I was stricken to my core with the genuine love of Christ, in a man, and I knew it was real. I was so overwhelmed by the Spirit that night. I was completely saturated in Love and awe. All I could do was say thank you. There was so much more I wanted to say and so many “things” I could have been praying about. But instead, my thank you’s were coming out like water, like a sweet melody that I couldn’t contain even if wanted to. I don’t know how long this went on, but I’m guessing about an hour.

Cameron did exactly what he said he was going to do from that point on. He pursued me AND my kids. They were never excluded from our time together. If he came in town to see me, he wasn’t asking me to get a babysitter, he was making plans to go to Zoo! It was the most beautiful thing I had ever experienced. Not only was he trying to win my trust, but also theirs. He never skipped an opportunity to spend time with them. He invested in them so much from the very beginning. He played lots of soccer games, helped with homework, and rocking the little one to sleep became a favorite for both of them. He fully embraced being a part of their lives to the extent they allowed him to. His relationship with them was growing, and it was the coolest thing to watch. After an eventful family experience like a trip to All Star Sports or even eating at a restaurant (any outing with 4 kids can leave you feeling like you ran a marathon), I would always cautiously check on him. Are you sure you’re ok? I must have done this too often. One day he finally looked at me half way insulted and said, “You guys didn’t change my life Stephanie, you FULFILLED it.”

Being treated with tenderness and love in word and action is the most life changing experience in the world. The gratefulness that overwhelms me in some of the most random moments still brings me to tears. You see, after a painful past, you don’t know how to just Get used to it. You are grateful over and over and over again. You want people to know what love actually IS and is not. There was a time my heart yearned for a “love” that was stained with pain and founded on lies. There was a time when a date was a trip to the bar. There was a time when love was nothing more than obeying my husband. There was a time when love was empty promises and manipulation. But when LOVE comes…when LOVE really comes, you get commitment and stability. You also get trust. And not the kind you pretend to have because you can’t let go of a person, but the natural kind that exists from simply knowing you are loved. You get someone who accepts you for all that you are, and all that you’re not. Someone who loves you for everything you will be and NOT be. You get someone who sees all of you. He sees every mood, every mistake, every flaw, every insecurity, every breakdown and doesn’t even think about leaving. Instead, he leans in closer and asks, “Can I help?” Sometimes, he just rests his hand on mine and says, “Together Forever,” something he’s made a habit of saying in our most difficult moments. My oldest daughter approached me once with an eye opening observation. She said, “Mom, Cameron treats you so good. He treats you the best when you deserve it the least.” What an astounding privilege for my daughters to have an opportunity to witness what love is. You see I know I’m no better than anyone else. I’m not more important, not more unique, no more special than the next. I did nothing to deserve Cameron’s love. And quite truthfully I’m not interesting enough to hold anyone’s attention for a lifetime. Cameron makes a choice everyday to fulfill his promise to me and leans on Christ every step of the way to do it. And through Him, I get a love that’s so piercing and so real I’m compelled to do better. This love makes me yearn and long to change, to serve better and to love him better everyday.

We’re talking about an ordinary man here, a man with imperfections and weaknesses. He’s not a super hero. Yes, he does get on my last nerve sometimes. But as broken women we put such low expectations on men that if we experience the real thing, we act like it’s a miracle. But the truth is a man is SUPPOSED to lay down his life for you. You weren’t designed to have to guess where he stands. You won’t have to worry about being the main woman or the side woman because you are the ONLY woman. And not because I said so, but because he’s following the example Christ gave him. I can honestly tell you there is nothing more sexy than a man who’s identity is in Christ. No swag in the world compares to a man with good character. None.

I can’t begin to know what Cameron’s experience in this relationship has been. Like, I don’t think there’s a way to fully comprehend it. He went from being a 30 year old bachelor with no kids to being a first time dad of four. And from the very beginning he had to start stripping away life as he knew it to make room for us. But he did so willingly, joyfully because loving us was his gain. And so the story continues.

God’s redemption is real. You don’t have to wonder if His plans for you are good or if He can really make things better. He will take your wildest dreams, and trump them 10 times. His hand is extended to you. His love is waiting for you. The life you’ve always dreamed of is waiting for the healed heart you’ve always longed for. You see, everything starts inside before we see it on the outside. Jesus is the only thing you can grasp onto without damaging your soul. There’s a difference between loving someone because it makes you feel better, and loving someone simply because you have the opportunity to make their life the joy you want it to be. So please forgive me if you don’t really care for my public expression of love and gratitude for my husband. But at least know that it comes from a genuine place. It comes from a place of worship and reverence and gratitude and sincerity. It comes from a place of hope and joy and fulfillment.

Life isn’t perfect, but it is indeed well. Marry someone who makes you fall in love with Jesus everyday.

“What I love most about America is how parents obey their children.” -Anonymous

This morning I came across a short video on FB showing different selfies of tourists visiting the Holocaust Memorial. A young Jewish man seeing all the poses, funny faces, and even upside down yoga stances took great offense to what he saw. Standing in the very place that 6 million innocent people died didn’t invoke tears, a moment of silence, or any solemn reflection. Where is the reverence in this generation? Where is the respect? Cam and I watched this video and felt such heartache and outrage. After watching the 2 minute video Cam looked at our 10 month old son, Caius and said, “Well son, this is the generation you have to lead.”

What a profound statement. My heart grieves knowing what direction we’re going in as people, as families, and as a nation. But I am more filled with inspiration and hope because I KNOW that we don’t have to believe the lie. The lie that says, “Just let go because the kids are going to do whatever they want to do anyway.” We are STILL parents. The ball is in OUR court. WE set the tone of our homes. WE guide the ship. WE create the environment. WE determine what is acceptable and what is not. Will they test the limits? Yes. Will they hate us at times? Yes. Will some even rebel against us? Yes. Does that mean we give up? NO!

We’re so busy trying to preserve relationship now rather than preserve their lives. We’re so busy looking at the short term, instead of the life they have to live long after we’re gone. Adulthood lasts so much longer than childhood. Are we preparing our children for that? It’s our job to raise leaders. It’s our job to mold good character. And it’s our job to live the example of the joy we wish their lives to be. We have a generation of young people who own a sense of entitlement and believe “struggle” is a bad word.

I’m not being insensitive. And I’m not standing in self-righteousness. I’m raising two teenagers and on any given day I’m tempted to lay down in my own frustration and exhaustion. And there have been days where I’ve ended the night in tears because I simply don’t know how to handle the next obstacle. But there isn’t an excuse good enough to let go of our children. Parenting alone is the hardest job on this planet. I honor you. But know this: YOU ARE ENOUGH! God chose our children for us. He entrusted them to you and in Him you are not alone.

Friends, don’t give up. Don’t even THINK about thinking about giving up! You don’t have to give your 15 year old daughter over to her first “serious” relationship. You don’t have to give your 10 year old a phone and social media access. You don’t have to give the 5 year old a tablet to play on just for a car ride. And you certainly don’t have to buy into the lie that since they’re 18 now, they’re an adult and free to make any choice they please. I’m not saying all of these are bad things or even the wrong choices. But be proactive and decide what you are going to allow and not allow. Talk about it. Keep talking about it. And then stand on it. And parents to adult children, you don’t have to bail them out of everything. Let. Them. Struggle. There are some things that can’t be purchased any other way. Things like, gratitude, humility, and a heart of compassion and  understanding. Don’t steal these great assets from them. As I type this I’m slowing down, choosing my words carefully, while still trying to be bold enough to share my heart. I’m not yet a parent of an adult child. And life has taught me enough to show me there’s wisdom in not speaking about things I haven’t personally experienced.

Parenting is hard. But hold your position and don’t grow weary. Everything is working against what your trying to accomplish. Peers, puberty, and our culture. But here’s the thing working against us we rarely acknowledge. Our own conscience. Our own inner voice. Those whispers that tell us the kids shouldn’t be bogged down with homework AND chores. The whispers that remind us how hard it was when we were kids so we don’t want our kids to go without. Some of this is valid. But I notice we tend to go to the extreme opposite when given the chance to do better with our own children. If we had nothing, we give them everything. If our mother didn’t let us wear make up in high school, we make sure our daughter has a full contour set in middle school. If we had to do too many chores, we don’t give our kids any. What are we doing? Where is the logic in this? We make these irrational choices from a place that hasn’t been healed in us. We make these choices in fear. We have to start making choices from a place of victory and purpose. If we know where we’re going we can endure the journey a lot easier.

As I go through each passing day with teenage issues ever present, this I have learned. Through the bad attitudes, the pressing of limits and even sometimes blatant disrespect, there’s a sadness that follows every time they think they’ve disappointed us. That means something. That’s a good place to be. Stop trying to protect them from everything and protect them from themselves. Say no. Create and establish boundaries. Teach them the meaning of truth and grace. Mean what you say. Love without discipline, isn’t love at all. Fight for their lives. Raise a leader and send them down the path of purpose and it will be the greatest reward of your life. Even when they stray from that path, they will find it again. And you can know that your “NO”, helped get them there.

 

 

Here we are again, officially past our originally set launch date. Man, what a ride it’s been. We’re learning so much along the way, mostly, what NOT to do. Just kidding. Right before we left Salina we said to ourselves, “We either heard from God, or we’re not very smart people.” Well our conclusion is…we’re not very smart people. But God reminded us that it takes “not very smart people” to step out, dream big, and walk in faith.

In the last 3 months we’ve had 3 pre-launch services. These were held at The Center, a local Foursquare Church here in Wichita. Pastors David and Marla Beeson allowed us to use their facility for nothing in return and have also become mentors to us. What a drink of fresh water they’ve been to us. Two very special people and we’re so thankful to know them. Our pre-launch services have been exciting. Allowing us to create some culture and work out some kinks. God’s given us some great people to have church with.

Cam and I continued our search for a building over the last few months. As we grew, we knew The 316 needed a home of it’s own. We looked at many store fronts and many properties below $1500 a month. Many doors closed. Finding the right space was trickier than expected with so many variables to consider. Taking a break from it all, one Saturday we took the kids to Old Town for some family time. As we’re walking along and visiting all the shops Cam noticed a building across the street. We walked over and looked inside and could truly envision Sunday service there. It was exciting. It was bigger than all the small spaces that were affordable to us. It had enough room for everything. And although we knew it had to be out of our price range we called the number anyway. On the line was a very nice voice, Ginny, who was happy to hear why we were calling. I told her our vision for the church and she suggested setting a meeting with the investors who owned the building stating they had helped other churches before. We were delighted and thought, “What the heck?” and scheduled a meeting 2 weeks out. Over the next 2 weeks we talked to several people and it became clearer there was no way we could afford this building. We even considered cancelling the meeting altogether. After talking and praying we decided to go and just see what happened. What could it hurt, right? The day came and Cam and I dressed in our Sunday’s best. We tried to look the part real good. Ha-ha! When we arrived, we were sat at a conference table in a small room. We waited. To our surprise, a barefoot man in jeans and a t-shirt walked in, shook our hands and said, “What’s up?” We were so confused. I can’t help but laugh as I type this. It was quite an experience. Then in came his assistant, Ginny, who we had been talking to up to this point. Cam was able to share the vision of the church and all we wanted to do in this building. They listened intently. As soon as Cam was done talking he told us what we already knew…there was no way we could afford it. Even though we knew it, it still stung a little bit to think we just wasted our time and theirs.

Then, something happened.

After a few moments he looked at us and said, “I just bought a church at 944 S Topeka, I can take you to look at it today, and if you guys like it I’ll give it to you for $1.00.” Yes, he said ONE DOLLAR. Cam and I thought we heard him say that and we looked at each other. But I think we both thought surely he couldn’t have said that so we dismissed it. We did agree however to look at the building. We set an appointment with Ginny to meet there at 2 o’clock that same day. I got to the building a few minutes before Cameron and met Ginny on the back steps of the old Grace United Methodist Church. To my astonishment, the building I was looking at was a total of $39,000 square feet, and worth 4.3 million dollars. The original building holds a sanctuary that seats 500 people, a commercial kitchen, 10 rooms a variety of sizes, and 2 reception areas. In 1958 they added a connecting building known as the Education Wing which includes an additional 20+ rooms, a gymnasium, 3 more small kitchenettes, a library, and a built in daycare center. It was truly breathtaking. As I was taking it all in, Ginny looks at me says, “I’m not sure if you guys understood the last time we said it so just to clarify, if you like the building…we will sign it over to you for the purchase price of $1. You can have it.” Overwhelmed is a weak word to describe what I was experiencing. I immediately started crying. I could not believe what I heard. I sent Cam a text right then and there, “WE HAVE A CHURCH!!!” Cam soon pulled up and we spent the next hour walking through the building. We could see life in every room and a use for every piece of the building. It was the most exciting couple weeks from the start of all this we had.

Since being given the building we’ve been in the due diligence phase. We’re learning there’s a lot more to inheriting real estate than meets the eye. Coming in as owners to a huge property that’s dated and needs lots of TLC requires planning, budgets, labor, money and LOTS of vision. Were so excited for all the ministry that can be accomplished and opportunities this building will bring. Our faith has grown so much along this journey and I can tell you no one wants this process to be finished more than we do.

The last 8 months since moving back to Wichita have been a roller coaster. I can honestly say NOTHING has went as planned. There have been many setbacks and I’m convinced the enemy wants to discourage us enough to quit before we even start. But in all of the trials, our vision has only grown. What we could see then is a vague comparison to what we can see now. God’s passion is people and He’s doing something in the heart of Wichita that will spread throughout and transform this city. We’re fighting for something bigger than what we first thought. We don’t know quite literally if we will be able to sustain this building. But we also know fear cannot own us when a great cause rules our hearts. There is so much stirring inside us now we’re praying for the capacity to carry it. We’re asking God to expand the boundaries of our love for His people and give us the strength to do what needs to be done. We originally thought we would come here and plant a church. And we are. But now we want to jump in and partner with God in His plans for this city. A transforming cause is never about you. It is always about using the resources God has given you to make a positive impact in the lives of others. Since the news of the building, The 316 team has seen how God strategically placed us all here together…and our WHY is being deeper discovered. Love is the best sermon anyone will ever experience. And our desire is touch every life with it.

We set a launch date for the church of January 8^th. We make plans, but the Lord directs our steps. We’ve decided to start services elsewhere until the church is ready. Since the process has taken longer than expected we don’t want to forget that church is about the people, not the building. We were offered a couple spaces to use and will start weekly services beginning February 12^th. The service and location details will be released on our website and on our Face Book page. This will allow us to become a congregation with regular fellowship and we will move together when the time is right into our permanent home. We will definitely celebrate and have a Launch/Open House Event when the time comes.

When we first started this, our slogan was JOIN THE MOVEMENT. You may have seen it a time or two. We thought it was catchy and inviting. Now, we ask you very literally to JOIN THE MOVEMENT. Your cause was made to consume you. When it does, you become like the sun, a blazing ball of energy that illuminates and brings life to a world of frozen hearts and souls. There are many things we’re not good at. We need tech help, graphic design help, basic administration help, artistic help, and every bit of financial help we can get! We are waiting for YOU. God put things inside of you to give. We’re living in a time of the greatest generation of cause-driven volunteers who are willing to change the world! And we’re asking God to send many more our way! Leaders are not great without other great leaders serving along side them. We need your ideas, your passion, and your presence to be all God desires us to be. If we strive together to be like-minded people who want to exercise God’s power and heal broken lives, then we give people a cause worth disrupting their lives for. Please help us do it.

To all the Pastors and leaders in this city, please contact us if we can come and share the vision of The 316 with you and your congregation and/or committee or board. We would love for you to partner with us in our efforts against Human Trafficking, our youth and family programs, and our goal for additional Safe Houses, and our extensive discipleship program.

To our family and friends, remember us in your prayers always! Please continue to support us financially and any other way you can. A couple members of our team are job seeking right now so we ask for prayer for God’s continued provision and the right placement. Please pray for Cameron’s overall health. He’s seeing a specialist this month and addressing some issues. Please pray for our children and our marriage. “Balancing” a big family isn’t always easy. Instead, we ask God for His supply of grace to get us through the ebbs and flows of our ever-changing life. To my husband Cameron and our lead Pastor…thank you for being who you are. You lead with consistency and a genuine message. You are kind, funny, and stay true to who you are (one of the things I love about you most…never change that). I’m honored to be on this journey with you. #TogetherForever

 

 

 

August 2016. Here we are. We abandoned life as we knew it for full throttle, full time ministry. What a thrilling, exhausting, vulnerable, and fun experience it has been so far.

Cam and I moved to Wichita in June. We had a great plan. I was coming back with a job all lined up. I was simply going to go back to work when Caius was a couple months old. Cameron was going to start substitute teaching when the school year started and on paper it all made sense. We were going to be fine. Within days of moving back the job fell through. But we didn’t panic. “I’ll just look for a job.” I said. After a couple GREAT interviews that did not produce a job all the temptation was there to start worrying. But we knew we couldn’t. What is taking a leap of faith without trusting Him? We say we trust Him, but when He requires us to it seems strangely unfair. We kept it moving, one day at a time. In addition to resources getting tighter, our basement flooded and we spent all summer waiting on it’s repair and reconstruction, leaving all 7 of us living in the much smaller upstairs portion of our duplex with only two bedrooms. We had melt downs, tears, and tension as we all lived on top of each other while still adjusting to life with our newborn. Now, as much as that may sound like a nightmare, God was doing beautiful things all the while.

The job offer I had coming back was to care for an elderly woman I had previously cared for a couple years earlier. Just days after our arrival in Wichita she had a stroke and within a few days she passed. On her deathbed she asked for a minister. The family called me asking if Cameron would come, we smiled and prayed, knowing our work here had begun. We were able to minister to the whole family that day and it was definitely one of our first “God moments”. From that point on we were making daily connections, often at random places and with lots of old friends. We became intentional and purposed to love on people and we began having “divine appointments” everyday.

Momentum for the church began to build and we could feel it. We had people reaching out and were able to start seeing the needs of Wichita more clearly. Everyday, no matter how small or insignificant, we were doing something to build and take care of the back end work. We found ourselves the busiest two people with no jobs on the planet. We moved forward, trusting Him and preparing for our first vision casting date. We had a great turn out. 47 people came to hear about the heart of the church and off we went…officially building The 316 community. Wow. We went to bed that night soaking up the victory of God’s grace and strengthened in faith. The next day we had to visit the reality of our situation again and decide which bills to pay and which ones would have to wait while seriously considering other alternatives that would help our situation. What a humbling moment that was. Low and behold within 2 weeks of this date, we both secured jobs (Cameron starts Monday). Glory. To. God.

Our families have rallied around us as our biggest supporters. It’s been such a blessing for my husband to be near his family again after so many years apart. It’s been good for his heart and a really special thing to witness. Learning how to love Cameron on this grand adventure has been a call to die. Marriage has served as a mirror, showing me my true self. Ouch. As I look back over the last few months I can see his consistency. Our home is sometimes organized chaos at best, but he’ll probably never understand the peace he’s brought us. In our most difficult moments he often reminds me of his love, and that no matter what happens we’re #TogetherForever. He’s such a gentle, powerful force. Cameron teaches me so much. He’s shown me how to live heart forward. I’ve watched him lean into loving someone, even when his flesh wants to pull away. As we learn how to do this better, our thinking about them changes. I’m learning how to love first, even when I don’t understand. He’s shown me how to lead with my heart and let my head catch up later. Living heart forward, from the depths, changes how we see and understanding things. My heart can believe things that my mind can’t comprehend. My spirit can grasp things that my brain can’t fathom. What an honor it is to be this man’s wife. He makes me a better me but the truth is…He’s better than me, and I love him for it.

Some days we feel tired, physically not spiritually. But we recognize the enemy often takes advantage of our tired state and tries to trick us into thinking his words are ours. We know better. We know he waits for weakness to come because he is too afraid to face us when we’re strong. What he doesn’t realize is we are always strong because God is always with us no matter how we feel. He is strong and He is in us, therefore we are strong…always. When we feel weak and tired, Jesus invites us to lean on Him. Holy Spirit whispers the truth of who we are and reminds us about the glory of the King we love and serve. We soak up the warmth of the glorious light radiating from the Giver of life and our spirits are refreshed. He reminds our tired bodies of the eternal life pulsating through every fiber of our beings. We are alive. We are strong. We are glorious no matter how we feel. Feelings change, but truth stands the test of time. God is with us and He is good.

To everyone who prays for us, thank you so much. We don’t take it for granted. Please continue to lift us up as a new school year starts and our children make another transition into new schools. And for us, as we start a much busier schedule with jobs and The 316, not wanting to lose any momentum with the church. We’re looking for our core leadership team and for a location right now.

We march onward with anticipation and excitement for what God is doing in the land of the living…we just want to be a part of it, and look forward to sharing it with you!

God is Love.